Stairway To Bedrock

Originally published on Scribd, January 21, 2011

I wrote this Minecraft-based parody of “Stairway to Heaven” after being inspired by a Twitter comment by Wes Wilson of The Shaft Podcast: “Finally got onto the MinecraftWB server… working on a stairway down to bedrock.

Oh… just so you know: the original version didn’t have rhyming lyrics where you’d expect them, either.

Now, because I can’t sing to save my life, anyone can record this if they want to – but please don’t change the words, and I’d appreciate an attribution!

Stairway to Bedrock
(parody of “Stairway to Heaven” by Led Zeppelin)

There’s a miner who’s sure
All that glitters is gold
And he’s mining a stairway to bedrock

When he gets there he knows
With a couple of blows
Iron picks help him get what he came for

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
And he’s mining a stairway to bedrock

There’s a sign on the wall –
So he’s been there before
Any resources there have been taken

Punching trees, cows and pigs
And occasional sheep
But the sun in the sky is a-settin’…

Ooh, it makes him nervous

Ooh, it makes him nervous

There’s a feeling he gets
When he looks to the west
For he knows he must hurry to shelter

In the dark he has seen
Zombies ugly and green
And the squealing of spiders who seek him

Ooh, it makes him nervous

Ooh, it really makes him nervous

If he stays there, then soon
In the light of the moon
He may find he’ll be meeting his Maker…

But the new day will dawn
And if he’s standing strong
The undead will all burn in the sunlight

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, ooh, whoa, oh

If there’s a zombie, well then you know
You’d better go slow
He’s come for your brain –
What a real pain!

Exploring caves can be so much fun
But you’ll be long gone
If you’ve no armor
To rely on

Does it make you nervous?

Aw, uh, oh

Your legs are running but they won’t go –
Why are they so slow?
That creeper doesn’t want to hug you!

It’s hissing now; you think it might blow
And did you know
Your loot will fly to the whispering wind?


And as you journey down the road
More monsters come to steal your soul
But when you die, you surely know
Back to the spawn point you will go
You can come back to mine for gold
And if you try so very hard
The diamonds come to you at last
When all are gone, then that’s not all
Go mine more rock to reach your goal

And he’s mining a stairway to bedrock…

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